rocking with emily the strange

Saturday, March 31, 2007

out with dad and mum to waraku today..
then bought a dvd recorder..
then to upper cross street for desserts..
then home..
then..me and my cup noodles..
then sleep...
was a boring day except for the out with dad and mum part..
nothing much for today's post though....
haiz...
i kinda hate friday already...
cos it leaves me lotsa space to ponder and think...
don't ask me what i am doing..cos its basically nothing...

i think curfews is spoiling both my friendship and my relationship..
how i wish i can stay out late too..for once...because u liked it...
my mood is kinda lousy today...i should sleep and forget about being lonely and miserable..
sick and moody...
i can't do anything right..
so..
might as well....

argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i'm just feeling sour...thats all.....

this is so strange
3/31/2007 12:33:00 am

Monday, March 26, 2007

yesterday was steph's birthday party and its a 21st one, really memorable.
i think she was quite disappointed with the present i gave her..especially that stupid tiara.
lame stuff i know..damn..and i guess i talked too much..like my jokes are really funny but i think they are not..i'm such an irritating person.. only disgrace people...and guess what?!?i'm just trying to be myself..and myself...either you accept me or don't, end of story.

help out today, both me and my mum are sick..down with fever..argh...don't know what to do for the whole day...damn....

this is so strange
3/26/2007 08:55:00 pm

Friday, March 23, 2007

morning i went for a tryout for this band, century for romance. I don't think so i make it..because of the genre they play..alternative or maybe punk..
and i realise that i can't sing punk for nuts..maybe really can't..need professional training or whatsoever..
and eugene said i'm good for goth..evanescence and lacuna coil and nightwish kinda thing..but really..i don't wanna do just that...
fuck..really don't know what to do..i'll just give up since i don't have any talents..

and i went for lunch at sweet recipe with alvin..really light one..ha! and then for movies with his friends.. TMNT..teenage mutant ninja turtles..really cute ok!! i love raphael..so so cool!!!Love his weapons..and he's the 2nd brother!!!!!!!!bad tempered and fucked up attitude..
then to dinner..
awww..so romantic..candlelit dinner with baby boy..at jack's place..and its closing down soon..
and had pictures taken...and were really sweet!!!! love love!!!

this is so strange
3/23/2007 11:32:00 pm

Thursday, March 15, 2007

15th march

working at mama's shop today, can't find a job so i gave up and cashier at mum's.The day wasn't so bad,was boring though..but overall..its alright..missed him...another day to go..
aunt doris..buck..natasha, pat and lil javern came to my house!! he is so adorable..2 year old kid so cute!! he loves me..played with me alil..but he went home early..leaving me with my notebook..sitting side by side with natasha typing our way..updating blogs and stuff..
waiting for him to call..he should be finished by now..12.29 already...
where are you................

14th march

went out with alvin and his brother(MOFO), he's so cute and everything, and everyone knows that he love Benjamin!! you know!! Ben!! the guy, mama say that he's funny! wahaha!
anyways he and his oversized NIKE T-shirt,ichigo chain, baggy jeans,a small lil bag and nike shoes! seriously! sooooo cuteeeeee!!!!and a cool boy too!! look at all the "stunts" he does! hilarious....
alright alright..
i was waiting under their block, as usual, waiting for alvie to change(my chipmunk is always stoning at his closet, thinking of what to wear, but it worth you waiting,because he really looks cute and handsome after that...so ladies! tips: please don't complain if your boy is a metro or someone who loves to look at himself infront of the mirror, because he's trying to look handsome for you!*wink* trust me, he does!)
so we were all quiet and don't dare to talk at all, its not the 1st time i see kendrick, 2nd time, but we hardly talk!hope he loves the jellybeans i gave him though he tell me that he has stomach upset after having them..argh! wanna slap him in the face! but when i look at that cute lil face that resembles baby alvie..i melted..awww!!!
got the tickets for "happily never after" at cineleisure, we head off to heeren after long considerations of where to go for lunch..VILLAGE!fish and wedges for baby kendrick and rosti for baby alvie(awww i love calling them babies! i'm announcing! i have two boyfriends now! one of the age of 19 and the other one is 10! right..sorry i'll take that back, well..can i keep them both?????*puppy eyes*)
and for myself sashimi and scallops! yummy! kendrick took chocolate moouse for dessert!sweet!(have i told anybody that i have sweet tooth?!?)
and hey! we are opening up, we started to talk a little..(baby..kendrick's not weird..he's funny)and i talked him into taking photos with that statue specty cow outside village.really cute!no doubt! took pictures together,3 of us!wahaha!
and guess what!kendrick's just like alvin! they love to buy stuff!! and kendrick here bought a lil torch from action city!
we went for the movie after that!!!i think i neglected kendrick..because i kinda sticked to alvin all the time..i hope he understands the movie though,no subtitle at all..
i like it when alvin nag at kendrick sometimes..it seems like alvin doesn't want this brother..but actually he loves him..its always outta concern..like asking him whether he understands the movie..or when he ask him whether he's bored and when he ask me to hold him, when crossing the road and everything! i love it! something about alvin that i'm really proud of and something i'm really fond of!!!!!! a good brother indeed..
shopping around the place..i held his..lil hand..so cute..
why am i so happy about bringing him around..one answer!! because i want siblings!! always alone from young till now..so its not surprise that i'm excited about bringing him out..and his holidays' ending..
but this saturday will be all about me and alvin so..ya! thanks for taking off days for me!! really appreciate and really felt cherished and loved! thank you baby!

this is so strange
3/15/2007 11:37:00 pm

Sunday, March 11, 2007

BBQ was last night, really excited about it and stuff..
got to meet ben, joy,alv again..though its wee seng's birthday(last night was the 1st time i meet him)
ben taught me how to fly a kite yesterday, ha! was really fun and stuff, now i know how to fly one already..
wind was really strong yesterday..ha! everyone's hair were in a mess..except for ben's..(short hair)
but...the birthday turn out to be a disaster..got everyone upset..
and spirits were dampened..
i wasn't feeling really well last night due to my sensitive stomach, that kept churning and result to me vomiting after i return back home.
i went back with Joy after that, and...haiz...wasn't really pleased with Alv..
my selfishness and all..
kept thinking and pondering...a bad habit of mine...really thought that i really can't do anything for him anymore..cried while taking a shower..cried to sleep..and woke up crying.. i can't believe this is hurting me so bad..
maybe this is the 1st time..i adore someone this bad..i kept filling his bottle..but left mine uncorked and empty..i know he's doing the same for me...and i'm really happy..but what was wrong me last night..its not the 1st time i have to go back alone..why do i have to feel those ways..i think i really rely on him too much that i forgot about who i was..me not being independent enough, not strong enough..
leaving emo aside..this is miserable..clutching my chest while cry to sleep..he's not hurting me i know..i'm just letting my thoughts go wild again..let it wander around..hurting myself with whatever thats not happening..
wondering what would happen if someone who is in his arms wasn't me..what if one day..he says he had enough of my nonsense..
i know that this is not the same...this thing...this bond..this covenant..this relationship between is really different..positively.. everything is working fine..
but because of my jealousy..selfishness..self-centeredness..every inch of me is bearing this guilt...i feel like taking back everything i say......to him.......but we know..that this have to be settled..we gotta have a talk...

this is so strange
3/11/2007 11:01:00 am

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

morning started gloomy as usual..
mornings always don't turn out right..now i was wishing how fine it will be if theres school..
there are always unnecessary problems created..nobody understands why..
if my parents would one day stop raising their voice..like i said..i understand english and i'm not deaf so don't raise your voices..its me..sometimes..me and my attitude..
felt really irritated if i'm force doing things i don't wanna do..
and my parents have a major problem!!!
which they don't listen to kids..and why?
because i'm not an adult..
because whatever comes out from my mouth is simply rubbish...
like..as if...i shouldn't even be in this family..because Yvonne HAS NO SAY!!
and it always seems that she is the one creating all the troubles...
mum and dad..i'll apologise if i lost my temper this morning!!!!
but...do u even apologise if you are the people who lose it to me 1st?
well.. i hardly argue back nowadays..
just ignore those unnecessary stuff you always say..
like:
saying i'm hopeless
or.. to compare me and some shit..
not helping out or whatsoever..
attitude problem...
saying that i should go back to my biological father...

and let me tell you...if you want me to go back to him...i would rather die...
guess what..i will cut my wrist....

this is so strange
3/07/2007 10:36:00 am

Thursday, March 01, 2007

The photos are up!!!!
yeah yeah yeah!!!
Not really nice but here to show u some:

Theres more but....ha! only show u guys this 2!!haha!!! my favourites!

this is so strange
3/01/2007 11:59:00 pm